Picture this: It’s a Monday morning and you just arrived at work. You are already exhausted because you’ve been fighting for your marriage for 2 months now, trying to get your husband to end an emotional affair with a coworker, working full time, taking care of your 5 month old son full time because previously mentioned husband declared he was going to live with a friend in Lawrence part time to “decide if he wants to try in the marriage or not”, and you are just hoping the week will go by peacefully and quickly. You decide that since its only 8am, you’re the second one into the office, and you aren’t awake enough to dive headfirst into your work, you decide to check your personal email and ease your way into the workday. But you go to pull up yahoo, and it’s not your account that pops up, its your husbands. Because on yahoo, if you’ve logged into multiple accounts at once you can just toggle back and forth between the two. And when you’ve been married for 3.5 years and together for 10, its pretty safe to assume that you’ve been on your spouses email account at least once in that time frame.
Category: infidelity
To Him.
I’ve sat here staring at this page for hours, weeks, months, and every time I feel like I have something to type out, my fingers freeze and the words escape me. The truth is, I don’t think he ever appreciated the painful beauty of our journey. I don’t think he liked the openness of our struggle, the visibility of it all. And not like it really matters anymore, but I know he wouldn’t want me to share what life the past 6 months with him has been like. I guess a part of me also doesn’t want to share while another part is screaming to let the monster out. So I will keep this brief.
To My Son, Part II.
One year ago today, surrounded by family and friends, a balloon was popped and blue confetti rained down. And my beautiful baby boy, I am so sorry that I was so sad. In hindsight, I was being so silly. But at that moment in time, I was scared and sad and confused about why I was feeling this way when I knew you were happy and healthy and I prayed and wished for you for so long.
If anyone wants a recap of the blog post that shook the world, you can find that Here.
To Her.
I am told that I don’t treat you like a human being, and maybe that’s because to me, you are more monster than human. He was married, he had a new baby, but you felt the pull and drew him in closer.
I know, you can tell yourself that you were the victim, that but do you honestly think that is true? You knew he had a wife, a son. You knew we went through hell and back to have our baby. You knew we had 3 frozen embryos waiting in a deep freeze for us. You met me. You were at my house for our Christmas party. I bought your son a cookie at Starbucks and less then an hour later you had my husband back at your apartment. What kind of woman does that? What kind of woman are you to sit on the phone and talk to me for almost 2 hours, saying you never wanted to ruin a marriage, that you don’t know why you are acting like this, it’s not who you are, that my husband was being irrational and that his reality is to be home with me and Bodhi? You claim you wanted him to stay away from you. You claim he was the one that wouldn’t leave you alone.I believed you. I believed every word you told me, and it was all just a lie. I was a fool for trusting you, for trusting that you would stop. But you didn’t stop, did you?
Meet the Applegates 